Drunken blog posts....

Why do people send drunken text messages? Do I really care that you are plastered at 3 am? I have a problem of writing drunken blog posts. I always regret posting the message the next day, yet I don’t want to delete what I have written because it’s a good message. I have written so many papers and documents for work that my spelling a grammar is very good. I can spill out a few paragraphs about any topic and then edit the work with very few mistakes; all while being too drunk to stand up straight. To all the people I wrote messages to the other night or the people that read my last blog post I apologize. When I am drunk, just like everyone else, I tend to tell people too much. Yet, after the hangover goes away I fell better that I told every how I feel. It helps to get it all off my shoulders.

Why be fearful of who I am?

I recently joined eharmony. I took the personality test and the personality test told me something that is true. I have a closed off personality. I have trouble showing others my feelings. I tend to close myself off from others. I have been burned many times and I tend to feel like it’s my fault. In reality, I didn’t do anything wrong, but I still feel like it’s my fault. I don’t want others to see my soul, but I do. I want people to understand who I am, but they cannot read minds. In reality I want people to understand who I am, but I have trouble telling people how I feel because I am fear full of what they will think. Why is it so hard for me to display me feelings for others? I don’t have the answer. Probably because I have been burned so many times that I don’t want to be hurt again.

I met a woman, not a girl, chick, or female. I am woman that is that type of person that I would like to spend more time getting to know. A woman that has her own mind that does not always represent that norm; what is the norm anyway?

On one side I don’t want to be afraid of my feelings. On the other side I don’t want to scare the potentials off. I am the type of person that can’t adapt to any situation. I want people to like me, love me, and I think they do. I am a likeable person. The question becomes; do they like me because I adapted to the situation to make myself more likeable, or do they like me for who I am.